Warning – I’m really upset and am having a bad day. So this blog article is not going to be happy, warm and fuzzy kind.
Dear Readers of my Blog (should I call you Bleaders??),
I have just experienced one of the worst forms of customer service ever. I am so angry and irritated that even my colleagues want to run away from me.
I had to go to the bank, yet again, to provide them with documentation giving proof of my new physical address. After driving to the bank in a torrential flood and almost being involved in 17 accidents, I finally got to the bank. I waited in a queue for an hour. I sat in front of my ‘friendly service consultant’. It took him three minutes to explain to me how the bank could not accept any of my documents because there was something ‘technically’ wrong with each of my documents:
- The one document was missing one word (‘latest’)
- The one document came from a company and not from an individual person
- The one document said ‘invoice’ instead of ‘statement’.
So basically, this entire experience was a huge waste of time. Does the bank not realise that I had to take time off work in order to go and see them? Does the bank not realise that I have a day job? Does the bank not realise that they are pathetically anal retentive? Does the bank not realise that they almost made me into a crazy, psychotic banshee?
Now dearest Readers, I am normally a calm and kind person. Most of my friends have never seen me truly angry. In other words, it takes a lot to get me to the point of wanting to cause large-scale physical destruction. But I am there now.
Absolutely pathetic customer service.
Does the bank not want me as a customer? Are they deliberately trying to p!ss me off so that I take my business elsewhere? Did some cruel bank employee come up with a list of 73 ways to really upset their customers? Why can’t their processes just be easy?
I compare this latest experience with how things are for our students at College SA:
- Want to register with us? EASY! Call us on 0861 663 663. It’s even a toll-free call.
- Want to register with us without having to leave your office or your house? EASY! Call us on 0861 663 663. You don’t have to come in to see us to register with us. We can do it all over the phone.
- Want to register with us without having to fill in fifty-six forms and documents? EASY! Call us on 0861 663 663. We have a paper-less registration option.
- Want to register with us easily and in a hassle-free manner? EASY! Call us on 0861 663 663. Our registration process is so quick and simple that we promise you that it won’t call you any stress.
- Want to register with us but you want us to contact you to start the process? EASY! Go to our website and click the shiny red button at the top of the page that says ‘CLICK and WE WILL CALL YOU FOR FREE‘. It literally won’t cost you a cent, or an aneurysm. You give us your contact number and somebody will call you.
- Want to register with us and start your studies quickly? EASY! Register with us and you will have your study material and be studying in three days or less.
- Want to deal with somebody friendly and knowledgeable when you register with us? EASY! When you register with us you will speak to a helpful and friendly Personal Student Advisor.
You see, it’s so easy with College SA.
More things in life should be easy:
- Butternut should be easy to cut
- Hair should never frizz
- The kettle should always have water in it already
- Shops should have traffic cops in them preventing congestion in the aisles
- Shops should have more tellers so that we don’t have to wait in long queues
- The roads should have more lanes so that traffic can flow smoothly
Yes, I can keep dreaming.
But seriously, with College SA, joining our family is really easy.
[PS: I have to go back to the bank now. If you hear about a crazy lady that took an axe and smashed all the glass and desks in a bank, you can be sure it was me. I’ll try to look pretty for the security cameras. I might go crazy, but I still want to look good doing it].
That’s a wrap,